Friday, April 18, 2008

Dr. Cracker: Italian Style

They, who ever "they" are, say everytime you have a new experience you add 45 days to your life. I now owe my new lengthened life span to the Italian Chiropractor I visited a few days ago.

Due to Holland and my Ostrich-ing into the ground I was having issues. Unfortunatly, Dr. Dave is not here in Lucca to fix me up and make me new (I wish I could just bring him along in my suitcase). I needed help and rumor had it this Italian doctor was good and worked on cyclists.

Did he speak English? No idea.
How expensive is he? No idea.
Would he be able to fix me up and make me new? No idea.
Where was his office? No idea.

All I knew was his address, phone number and that I had a 10am appointment. Ok, here goes. Bring on the 45 days.

I was a little bit worried. So I asked our friend and take-care-of-us-person, Lise, if she would call him for me and tell him what was going on and want I needed fixed. Phew! That makes me feel better. I plugged the address into the TomTom and was on my way.

Turns out, he spoke a little bit of English. We talked about my problems (neck, upper back, hurting ribs) then got to work.

"Ok we start." And he patted the table.
"Should I take off my shoes?"
"Yes, and your pants."
What?! Dr. Dave has never asked me to take off my pants before.
"But I'm only wearing underware!" Oh no! I'm wearing a lot less than that. I do not want to be face down on the table wearing only butt floss.
"Ok, but maybe you undo." He said as he pointed to my zipper and buttons.

Being slighly uncomfortable I sat on the table. He assessed me, then explained to me how exactly I must have crashed. He was spot on. Wow, not bad.

He then did the standard cracking and muscle testing. Followed by a rubber gloved finger stuck in my mouth (this is werid). Apparently a certain tight jaw muscle can affect the motion of your neck.

He fixed it and then told me to take off my shirt. Again with the "whoa"! He said he would do some massage. Oh! nice. Ok. I got on tableface down. He then proceed to oil up and take off my bra. Again with the "whoa"! Once more, glad I still had my pants on.

After 45 minutes, an assessment, cracking/fixing, massage and stretching I was sure I was headed into the poor house in order to pay this guy. In the US a Chiropractor will maybe spend 20-25 minutes (if you're lucky) on you and it'll cost $50. Needless to say I was plesently surprised when he said 35 (euros).

I left his office feeling better, straighter, and younger (I just had had 45 days added to my life).


G as in Chris said...

Whoa indeed! Italian chiropractors rock!

Anonymous said...

ha! sounds like he added 45 days to his life, too